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Ancient grain…

October 17, 2011

And that’s where this whole toughness issue gets very tricky…

In North American hockey,

we’re conditioned to believe that never retaliating,

that discipline beyond a certain point,

illustrates a kind of weakness,

and can be degrading for both the victim and his team…

The Sedins believe the opposite…

Daniel admits he has tried to understand the Canadian mindset,

but “I’ve never really gotten that…”

He also points out that when he went cuckoo-for-coco-puffs,

a couple of years ago,

and attacked Chicago Blackhawk Dave Bolland in the playoffs,

he was universally criticized for losing composure…

His retaliation was reported as proof that Sedin,

by “not sticking to his game,”

had been outwitted and outplayed…

— courtesy of Iain MacIntyre and the Vancouver Sun, 15/10/2011

It’s funny,

how life,

flips out,

on you,

when you’re looking,

the other way…

Yesterday,

as I leaned,

on the rail,

of Trillium Park,

in the crisp,

afternoon sun,

reflecting upon,

a time,

when I stood against,

the building,

of destination,

playing fields,

in my neighbourhood,

I realized,

I’d been,

such,

a major,

NIMBY,

and I had,

to laugh,

at myself…

And as Starshine’s team,

of U13 girls,

worked together,

toward,

their first shutout,

of the season,

I talked,

a mother down,

from her fear,

of death,

and dying,

by saying,

This is a fantastic opportunity…

You’re giving yourself,

another chance,

to find out who,

you really are…

Most of us,

have heard,

this one,

before…

The story,

of celebrating,

the first day,

of early retirement,

with the negative,

test results,

of melanoma,

and having to,

sift through,

what it all,

must mean…

One of the things,

we’ve allowed,

doctors to tell us,

is how long,

we’ve got,

to live,

and that sentence,

quite frankly,

is none,

of their GD business,

not mention,

the fact,

that we’re abdicating,

our own responsibility,

by asking them,

the very question…

Those sorts,

of agreements,

rest in,

safety deposit,

somewhere else,

and we each have,

our own key,

to the outcome,

and the mystery,

in trust…

A few weeks ago,

Little Gem,

and I,

were looking through,

a phobia file,

in a recent issue,

of Martha Stewart…

I asked her,

which fears,

she was aware of,

in herself…

She said,

I definitely have chronophobia…

I wondered why…

She said,

I used to think,

that we were one long,

never ending story,

but now I know,

it isn’t so…

Sometimes,

the story,

must end,

so a new one,

can start,

in the same body…

Then she asked me,

Mama,

do you know,

what you’re afraid of???

I told her how,

I never knew,

what my real fears were,

until I chose,

to make them happen,

and forced myself,

to sit in them,

and feel my way,

through,

with absolutely,

no short cuts…

And to quote,

my virtual,

BFF,

Mr. Torres,

at the end of the day,

I felt much better…

I remember someone,

providing,

interpretation,

as she held her hands,

over a bolt,

of collective rage,

as it grounded itself,

through,

my solar plexus,

True freedom comes,

from exercising,

the capacity,

to hold,

the intensity,

of strong emotions,

and not to be,

paralyzed,

in their wake…

I didn’t know what,

she was talking about,

at the time,

because I was still,

in the place,

of learning,

how to do it…

But I know now,

just like,

Roberto Luongo,

that it’s part,

and parcel,

of doing it right,

with all the help,

the REAL WORLD,

has to offer,

wrapped,

around you…

Starshine woke up,

this morning,

to report,

she’d had,

the best sleep,

EVER…

And like living,

a dream,

there’s quite simply,

no way,

to bottle,

that quality,

of experience…

Last Thursday morning,

just before,

my departure,

from time with,

a horse,

I picked up,

the edge,

of his hoof,

stretched his leg,

out in front of him,

and as he,

shifted his weight,

into the extension,

he looked down,

at me,

with a soft eye,

that said,

with no room,

for misinterpretation,

Now that’s what,

I’m talking about,

baby…

And in that moment,

as the sun came out,

in both of us,

I heard,

OUR SONG,

about mirrors…

And the earth,

was shaking…

With 1,000 churches... (photo: Starshine)

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