Canuck'd

Only that you are deeply satisfied

By creating them

Again and again

On your burlap…

— in Creative Rug Hooking by Anne Mather

This week prior,

while the Canucks,

are once more,

making key lime pie,

out of the southern states,

I received a call,

from the credit union,

of which I’ve been a member,

since I was eight years old…

As soon as I see,

that name,

and number,

on the call display,

I break a sweat,

as the belief system,

which has been,

Etch a’ Sketched,

into my cellular memory,

flashes red,

like a nuclear reactor,

in core meltdown…

I take deep breaths,

to fight down the panic,

that I’m about to be told,

yet again,

how fiscally irresponsible I am,

how I need to get my life together,

and move on,

and how I am not fulfilling,

my responsibility,

to earn a living,

and support myself,

and my children,

all on my own,

as history,

repeats itself,

with the same energy,

in a different way…

So when I return,

the message,

I steel myself,

for the worst,

case scenario…

And somehow,

each time,

I make contact,

with the other side,

the voice,

is reassuring,

saying,

things like,

You don’t have to worry,

I’m just calling about your renewal…

I’d really like it if you came in today,

because then I’ll be here,

and I’ll get to help you…

When I went into,

the downtown branch,

for service,

there was a lineup,

of people to see me…

The woman who has been there,

the longest,

and says,

I have a memory,

of you,

when you were pregnant,

with your youngest,

seared in my mind,

because your story,

rocked my world,

got to me first…

When I’d last seen her,

before Christmas,

the conversation,

spiraled on,

my research findings,

and she wanted,

follow up,

because what I have to say,

is so much fun…

She said,

I want to talk to you longer,

but I’m busy giving some customers,

a big quote…

Come back sometime,

and I’ll take you for coffee,

and you can tell me what to do,

because I want more,

and I don’t know how to go about getting it…

I didn’t quote her,

my big rates,

for speed dial,

because most people,

are not at that level,

and continue to believe,

that my skills,

and effort,

should come,

pro bono,

seeing as,

you can feel them,

but you can’t quite,

put your finger,

on them…

Try putting your finger,

on what a lawyer does,

without feeling,

but still having to pay,

through the nose,

if you choose to retain one,

because the fact of the matter is,

they hold,

the rights,

to the dominant,

discourse,

and they have no intention,

of letting go,

of a game,

which works,

to their own advantage,

for better,

or for worse…

I had a dream,

sometime in the last fortnight,

where my father’s mother,

came to me…

She said,

something like,

This is your time…

I told someone,

on Friday,

when he wished me good luck,

from the confines of his suit,

Thank you…

Lady luck,

is what I seem to have…

There are a lot of things,

I love,

about my cats,

and today I saw something,

I hadn’t found,

the words for,

until now…

After being chased,

and barked at,

by an old dog,

who can’t seem to learn,

any new tricks,

my boy,

ran in the house,

with a mohawk,

and then seconds later,

stretched out,

on the softwood floor,

with his paws sprung,

and cocked,

in preparation,

for any sudden movement,

which may be required of him,

at a moment’s,

notice…

I won’t tell Starshine,

and Little Gem this,

because of the potential,

for uproar,

but I’m thinking of changing,

boy cat’s name,

to Mase,

or Schneids…

Just to make,

a point,

with only one,

long distance,

assist…